Do yourselves a favour and leave the flakes at home

Since I can’t seem to halt the flood of mail from the Texas Coalition of Black Democrats and Senate District 13, I am going to share one of the more humourous examples with you.  At this point I am not even going to try to unsubscribe because the entertainment value is too high.

From: [Name redacted]
To: [a giant list of Texas Democrats voting to select delegates to the National Convention]
Date:    Fri, May 23, 2008 at 11:02 PM
Subject:    Not Your Ordinary National Delegate Candidate
Signed-by:    swbell.net

My advice is, leave the following guys at home:

• The JFK assasination researcher.  (Hint: Oswald did it.  With a bolt-action rifle.)
• The ordained ULC minister.  (Hint:  The Universal Life Church ordains just about anyone with a pulse.  Its honourary doctorates require no academic course or standard of achievement.  Not something you want to advertise.)
• The investigator of the paranormal.  (Hint: Ghosts lose their voting privileges at death, so they won’t be voting for Obama.  They’ll be waiting in the green room for a guest spot on that lame Jennifer Love Hewitt show.)
• The participant in the Social Revolutions of the Sixties.  (Hint: Replace the patchouli with deodorant and ditch the bell-bottoms for a nice [ironed] pair of flat front pants, hippie.)